Extensive Vamping

Now What?

Chris: “I’m en route to get a considerable amount of hair cut off. A lot of it. I figured you’ll freak out more than most everyone else.”

Me: “Every dude just wants to be Matthew Fox.”

Chris: “I don’t know who that is.”

Me: “The guy from Lost.”

Chris: “…”

Me: “I’m making you a Things You Need To Know to Know Stefi dossier. Like, “So you’re Willing to Put Up With Stefi, Now What?” That’s chapter one. “‘You talk a lot,’ And Other Things You’re Going to Say to Stefi.” That’s chapter two. Chapter three is, ‘How to Sit Through a Ten Minute Stefi Montage and Look Like You Like It.’”

Chris: “This is sounding like one of those timeshare deals where they lure you in with a hot piece of ass and then make it impossible to actually redeem.”

Me: “All I got from that is the part where I am going to just assume I am the hot piece of ass.”

Chris: “Well, if that makes you happy!”

Me: “You’re a dick.”